Your place to share stories on and off the bus.
Photo: razvan.orendovici
Does she know or doesn’t she?
Elderly woman on MUNI carrying a large bag of penis shaped pasta. I have to wonder if this purchase was intentional or not. #munidiaries #SF
— olivia june (@oliviajune) July 24, 2012
We hope this was a completely intentional purchase for a raging bachelorette party.
Photo by Stuart Dixon
We are still on a high from Friday’s Riders with Drinks, where so many of you came out that the Make-Out Room had to call for backup bartenders! We are speechless about the great energy from our performers and audience. We’ve got more Muni stories in the bag, but before we move on with the week, here is a little recap of the hot, hilarious, and awesome night at Riders with Drinks.
If you were there on Friday, you know that we closed the show with some homemade sock puppet re-enactment of the “Penis in public” story. Pictures of the puppets and other hilarity after the jump.
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Submitted by Muni rider plug1:
well, you said gross — so here comes gross.
a friend was over for drinks on sunday evening and mentioned that his girlfriend has experienced a tale of horror on the n judah this past saturday. she was sitting near the back in an aisle seat, listening to her ipod when she felt something tickling her cheek. moments later she realized there was a rock hard penis in her face.
a young man had pulled out his junk and was rubbing on her ear/face. startled, she jumped up and said “what the fuck!?!”. to her surprise none of the other passengers seemed to take issue. the young man continued to wave his wand around in the air near her seat. she shoved her way past him, then walked to the front of the bus, told the driver, and got off at the next stop — in shock.
a daily rider, she has not boarded muni since.
Storyteller Kathleen Auterio moved to San Francisco from Massachusetts to do new things, just like in the Bee Gees song. It was the year 2000, and everything seemed to be on track: she had an apartment, a roommate, and a job at SF Weekly managing the adult ads in the back of the paper—a job that accepted her as a proud metalhead. After meeting a new guy at the paper, though, they would soon come face to face with a relationship trust exercise involving a field hospital surgery.
(We can’t wait for you to listen to the episode so you can fully get all the puns we stuffed into this post. Our mouths are still agape.)
Kathleen is also one of our esteemed Muni Diaries Live alum. You can hear her story about an eventful Muni ride on Episode 81 of the podcast.
Listen to Kathleen’s story:
We want to hear your story about how San Francisco changed you—or vice versa! If you have a story to share or know someone who does, pitch us your story idea by emailing us at muni.diaries.sf@gmail.com. And don’t forget to subscribe to the podcast so you don’t miss any of these true tales from the city.
What books would you be too embarrassed to read on Muni? Fifty Shades of Grey? The Da Vinci Code? This Saturday, we will be at Green Apple Books On the Park, putting aside our dignity to do a dramatic reading of awesomely terrible books (that you probably shouldn’t read in public).
In case you’re wondering where to get the book in the photo above (from Bored Panda), I hate to disappoint you, but this is comedian Scott Rogoswky, who made some hilarious fake book covers to read on the New York City subway. Mmm. What wouldn’t I do for a dramatic reading of “101 Penis-Lengthening Tips”?
J.W. Friedman and Chris Collision, the funny hosts of the popular podcast I Don’t Even Own a Television, will be bringing a selection of their favorite (and least favorite!) bad books to read from.
Special guests (who are bringing their own selection of terrible books):
… and Muni Diaries editor Eugenia, representing nine years of cringe moments on the bus, thanks to y’all.
Bonus: Bring your own bad books for a round of Bad Books Russian Roulette!
Bad Books Party
Saturday, Feb. 11 at 7:30 p.m.—9 p.m.
Green Apple Books on the Park, 1231 9th Ave. in San Francisco
I gotta say: It’s not the greatest excuse for waiting 20 (I mean, 2, I mean 40, I mean 10) minutes for the next bus. And whatever happened to show don’t tell? Actually, given the amount of freewheeling penis on Muni, it’s always best to remember: San Francisco doesn’t shy away from a challenge, especially when it involves getting nekkid.
Spotted at Market and South Van Ness by @kirandoingthings on Instagram. Thanks for sharing, Kiran!