16th and Mission BART, about 5 p.m. on the second-hottest afternoon in recent memory. Agitated Man standing on landing of the east-entrance stairway eating a hamburger out of a McDonald’s bag and intermittently barking Spanish into a cellphone.
Commuter Woman in Skirt passes Agitated Latino Man. Moments later, Agitated Man is throwing hamburger buns at Commuter Woman in Skirt, screaming largely unintelligible remark ending (mundanely) in “comida.” Commuter Woman in Skirt looks annoyed & slightly threatened, but not overly upset (probably because he missed), proceeds down into station.
Moments later, McDonald’s food mostly consumed, Agitated Man gradually starts heading up stairs, passes Irritable Man with Dog. Agitated Latino Man stops to feed rest of hamburger to Dog. Dog, amenable, stops, eats hamburger. Irritable Man screams at Agitated Man (and/or Dog; wording was ambiguous), waves leash. Agitated Man proceeds back up stairs at accelerated pace, groping for cellphone.
Dog, detecting no further hamburger availability, follows Irritable Man into station. Curtain descends.
Photo by Flickr user canadianlookin.
Write us your own Muni or BART vignette —all characters welcome.
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Irritable Man was justifiably irritated. McDonald’s food is no healthier for dogs than it is for people.
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The last time I (half-willingly) ate at McD’s, I didn’t get energy or suffer an upset stomach. My only symptom was a noticeable irritation. Scratch that — it made me pissed off. I’ve sworn it off forever, along with Denny’s and Taco Bell. Subway, Chipotle, they’re different stories, and appropriate on road trips sometimes.
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Erik and Jeff, you obviously have missed the point of McD’s entirely! Two words: Sausage Mcmuffin. Well, actually, these are the only edible items from McDonald’s: sausage mcmuffin, hashbrowns, and french fries. Oh, their french fries! These are the only things I will eat at McDonald’s and they are sinfully good. I did get pretty sick on some chicken mcnuggets once.
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jeff Reply:
April 22nd, 2009 at 11:18 am
@Eugenia: Funny, the last time I ate there (after my vow of McD celebacy, of course) was to pick up a sausage mcmuffin. i asked for no “cheese,” though, and got it anyway, and that kinda ruined the deal. Still, I hear ya.
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I didn’t mean it necessarily tastes terrible (it tastes just fine in (extreme) moderation); Irritable Man probably just didn’t want his dog to turn into a shit fountain.
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