As things unfolded on Muni one day …


Photo by stevendamron

Just your average ride on the bus, as chronicled by @kudeki:

“Crazy guy gets on muni, refuses to pay. Bus driver stops the bus and says we ain’t goin nowhere til you pay. Guy curses at bus driver.” – 11:58 AM

“Guy stands over bus driver, threateningly, yelling that he’s been in this town 20 yrs and driver is the dumbest dumbfuck he’s ever seen.” – 11:59 AM

“Driver waves something in guy’s face, yells “get out”. Guy stands on steps, driver opens and closes doors on him, yell at each other more.” – 12:03 PM

“Doors close on guy, he picks up a half full anchor steam from a now-empty outdoor table at bougie pac-heights cafe. Walks away cursing.” – 12:07 PM

“Entire bus starts laughing. Hipster girl in big sunglasses, red flannel shirt and matching iphone case, says ‘This is why I love Muni.'” – 12:11 PM

And the grande finale!

“Several stops later, still in wealthy neighborhood, different crazy hobo type gets on bus, chanting ‘money talks, money talks.’ He pays tho.” – 12:15 PM

We’re guessing this ride was on the 22-Fillmore. What do you think? Had to be, right?

A Match Waiting to Happen on Muni

This is so a Pixar movie. That, or the beginning of a delicious snack of french fries and ketchup. Patricia sent us this pic, noting:

…saw this spud on the N a few days back. I like to imagine he (yes, it’s a he) is riding the Muni rails in search of his long-lost tomato…

I love how even this tough-skinned ‘tater won’t sit on Muni without a newspaper barrier.

Now, please keep your eyes peeled (HA!) for the Muni-riding hamburger searching far and wide for its sides.

Video: How to Drive a Bus in the Bay Area

Holy MF awesome! Our own Animals and Other Cities editor, Amy, brings us the find of the decade. It’s educational footage from the early 1980s that walks Bay Area transit drivers through the various shenanigans that happen on any given route. Among them:

  • Entitled old ladies who ain’t paying
  • Boom-box blaring teenagers (if you ask nicely, they’ll turn it off)
  • Teens who light paper fires in the back of the bus
  • Drunk dudes trying to board the bus, bottle in hand
  • Crazy lady who doesn’t want a ride, just wants to show off her fashion finds
  • Dudes fighting because one tripped the other
  • Olive Oyl and the purse-snatcher
  • Creepy dude who pre-rapes bus-driving lady

You know, the everyday stuff. And the soundtrack [exclamation point]

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