Grab yourself a seat on the BART dining car

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File this one under #zerofucks. There’s been a recent uptick in people spotted eating full meals on BART. The meals are all of a similar variety. First, above, the most important meal of the day:

So important to have a healthy breakfast! —@cuteinsf

Ah, ambiance!

Next we turn to BART rider snazzz, who recently saw not one but two (TWO!) people nomming down their diet dinners:

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Dude getting down and dirty on his lean cuisine on the train —@snazzz

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This chick also leaning on her cuisine on the train —@snazzz

What’s that thing they say? Three times makes a meme or something?

Previously on Muni Diaries
Muni Dining Car, Now With Free Coffee Refills
Idea: Muni LRV Subway Dining Car

Banana peel in Muni seat just wants to be loved

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This bus is serving…compost. I think I’d rather have the Franzia from yesterday, something I have never said before today.

I hope this wasn’t a response to me, I MEAN, that unidentified woman on Muni asking a guy, “Is that a banana in your pocket or are you just happy to see me?”

It’s somewhat less poetic and Pixar-movie than these traveling groceries, which included a potato and tomato escaping their fries-and-ketchup fate in favor of roaming the city, but I’ll take it.

h/t to Aleph (commenting, “I’ll have the vegetarian seat, please….”) on Facebook and Mitsi for telling us over at the Muni Diaries Facebook page.

The Muni bus that needed a little helping hand

Because ultimately, Muni’s buses (and light-rail vehicles) really do a lot for us, every once in a while, they morph into utterly helpless creatures in need of assistance.

Witness what Burrito Justice caught on video recently, above. Hey, it’s a first for us, too!

New Danish bus ad will blow your mind

The Danes have done it again in this high-production advertisement about how awesome it is to ride the bus. Yes, the bus!

Danish bus company Midttrafik created this Cannes-worthy video ad to celebrate the everyday bus passenger. He’s way cooler than everyone realized: his New York hairstyle and outlet sneakers literally will blow your panties off! Next time you get on Muni, don’t forget that you are totally and absolutely cool, too.

This ad is a sequel to Midttraffik’s Ecstasy Bus ad, which celebrates the “fantastic life” found on the bus. We highly recommend watching it again.

Dude crushes a box of Franzia on Muni

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My favorite part? This is actually our second post about a thirsty foot soldier crushing box wine on Muni. If box wine isn’t your thing, we’re also serving photos of an 8 a.m. beer and a cracked open 12-pack to take the Muni Metro edge off. If only the 77X-Candlestick—aboard which everyone went, “la la la can’t hear you” regarding pesky open-container laws—was still around, right?

Via Muni rider clowntraps, who says, “This guy was making the most of his Saturday afternoon, crushing a box of Franzia on the train.”

Dad: Sorry my son puked on you on Muni

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Say what you will about kids and their parents on public transit, this story might change your mind. Muni rider Nicolas wrote us this public apology:

Fellow J riders:

I’m so sorry. My 4-year old son projectile vomited on some of you at about 8:30 on February 3. We were inbound into Van Ness station, me standing, him on my left arm. No, I don’t normally hold 40-lb people but, as you heard, he was whining so I picked him up to comfort him and also to make your ride less unpleasant. You’re welcome. But I guess whining “I’m not going to make it” didn’t mean what I thought it meant.

The doors were seconds away from opening when he coughed. Well…it seemed like a cough. But there was stealth vomit behind the cough. The brunt of it landed on me (glasses, cheek, shirt, jacket, bag). If normal, it would have dribbled onto only me, but being the projectile variety, you folks within 2 feet got sprayed. I’m sorry.

I wish I could have apologized more but the doors were open by the time it landed.

But I did have a moment to look around to assess the damage.

I noticed you, Nicely Dressed Work Guy, sitting next to us with splatters of partially digested Eggo pancakes on your thighs. You smiled and said, “It’s okay. It’s okay.” Not polite but real genuine like maybe you’d been down this road before. Are you a dad? Just a nice guy? If you are not a dad, you should be. You’ve got the patience and sense of humor for it. Adopt or impregnate someone ASAP. Maybe we can be references for you on your Ok Cupid profile? (I’ve been married forever. Do people still use Ok Cupid? Either way, let us know. We will make you look good with prospects. We’d offer to vouch in person, but you probably don’t trust us now.)

I don’t know what I would have done if we had more time with you, victims of vomit. Offer to pay for dry cleaning? Buy you a drink? My son’s name is Seiji. He is good at making Ninja Turtle masks out of tin foil. Maybe you’d like some? If you see us again, let us know.

Until then, sorry,
Seiji’s Dad

On behalf of Muni Diaries, Seiji’s dad, we forgive you.

Photo by Transit Nerds

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