How To Avoid Bodily Fluids on Muni
A lot of gross stuff can happen on Muni, but we weren’t quite prepared for Muni rider Jean’s submission about a downhill-rolling 22:
Puke on the 22
Riding Muni blows chunks. Just like the girl behind me on the 22 that day. It was a few years ago and this girl who was sitting behind me started getting sick. She didn’t smell like booze, I think she was just having some kind of stomach thing.
Anyway, next thing I know, she puked on the floor of the bus. I heard this splattering noise and felt it splash on to the back of my shoes and my pants. OMG!!!! I tried not to freak out and calmly moved to the front of the bus, wishing more than anything that I could be off the bus and not wearing puke splattered clothes.
All was ok for about five minutes. That’s when the bus started going down a hill. The puke rapidly slid from the back of the bus to the front and everyone let out a collective groan of disgust/panic. That’s when I knew that ride was over.
Apologies if you lost your lunch a little just now. I know I did. So what’s a hygienic Muni rider to do? Dear Muni Manners ladies, got any tips for us to keep it clean and righteous on the bus?
Photo by Flickr user So Cal Metro
Man I was running up the steps to catch BART once and there was a puddle of puke on one of the steps and I’m pretty sure the person in front of me splashed it all over my pants. I kind of just had to forget about it.
While we Muni Ladies understand that sometimes there’s no advance notice on upcoming chunks, there are some measures that can be taken as insurance. First, we remind riders to drink and ride responsibly, as booze and bumps of transit don’t mix. And, avoid toting smelly foods on your ride – your digestive system (and the olfactory systems of those around you) will thank you. Finally, in the interest of hygiene, we suggest carrying a plastic bag if you know you’re sick and must be in public. If you have one on hand, offer it to someone who needs it more than you do!
Muni ladies, thanks for the tip! I think carrying a plastic baggie might be prudent for our pub crawl…
I found this post by searching ‘Hot Lunch,’ and I just thought I would share that it appears that that term is in the official Muni lexicon when referring to vomit on a bus. Now just as the Inuits have 100 words for snow, I am sure that Muni must have at least that many for vomit, but I like this the best.
A few years ago my wife was on a crowded 22 Fillmore (The Dub) and people were refusing to move to the back. A few minutes later, the driver came on the PA, and asked, “Can anyone confirm or deny the presence of a hot lunch on the back of the vehicle?”
Not too long after, I was sitting at the front of a Dirty Eight, and overheard another driver on the radio, making a rather official request for a janitorial team to address a hot lunch.
omg, skajam, you just gave me an idea: we should compile an open-source Muni lexicon, right here on Muni Diaries!