Category: Funny: Muni LOLs

Quick, give me an adjective and a noun to describe an object that was found on Muni today.

Remember Muni Mad Libs from the opening party for the Outbound show at Secession Art and Design earlier this summer? We posted and tweeted some your best Muni Madlibs from the opening, and today we’ve got more for you from last Friday’s closing party:

“Riding Muni is like dating curdled milk who has a profound unattainable itch.” – Carey B.

“Riding Muni is like dating crow who stuck a big turkey in my bag.” – Henry and Kelli

“Riding Muni is better than getting tickets because I didn’t move my car in time … oh, wait, that still happens.” – Tara

“Riding Muni is better than walking down the road feeling bad.” (ouch) – Henry

“A wicked goose egg was found on Muni line eleventeen today in Bayview. Passengers on the bus were clucking when the discovery was made, making this the most curvaceous bus line in the city today.” Kelly

“A hellacious trumpet was found on Muni line 4012 today in Hunters Point. Passengers on the bus were crumping when the discovery was made, making this the most slaughtered bus line in the city today.” – Phil

“An elliptical piece of concrete was found on Muni line 50 today in Noe Valley. Passengers on the bus were flying when the discovery was made, making this the most lovely bus line in the city today.” – Johnny

“A hairy motorcycle was found on Muni line 461 today in Nopa. Passengers on the bus were crying when the discovery was made, making this the most hopeful bus line in the city today.” – Anita

“A bright button was found on Muni line 37 today in Bernal Heights. Passengers on the bus were skiing when the discovery was made, making this the most curvy bus line in the city today.” – Vidya

Photo by chainsmokingbluemonkey

A few of you keen observers spotted something rather peculiar this weekend, even by Muni standards. Citywide, Muni’s NextBus marquees displayed the message above concerning Muni service and Sunday’s SF Marathon. It was one of those errors introduced “upstream,” as they say, evidenced by lachtaylor‘s iPhone screenshot:

“Detorus,” eh? I think that’s Latin for “detour.”

Hey, maybe Sarah Palin should hire this Muni copywriter. You betcha!

Also, in case you missed it, another Muni-SF Marathon FAIL.

The awesome Mr Eric Sir has a great idea for easier BART-to-Muni or Muni-to-BART transfers:

See? We eliminate two flights of stairs and save up to 5 minutes or so.

So what’s the rub, why didn’t they build the station like this in the first place?

It seems there simply isn’t enough room to have all the extra faregates and ticket machines we’d need on the station platforms. Or at least, it USED to be that way.

But now that we have Clipper, couldn’t we make do with less? All you’d have to do is exit Muni and tag on to Bart. Or in the other direction, tag off Bart and on to Muni.

Muni trains already have Clipper machines inside the train, and it’s a proof-of-payment system, so gates aren’t really needed. Bart could just have a couple faregates at the platform level. It wouldn’t have to take up too much space.

Wethinks this should be on a list of shovel-ready, high-priority stimulus jobs. You listening, Mr. Prez?

Above ossum grafik by Mr Eric Sir.