Eugenia Chien has been eavesdropping on the 47, 49, or 1 lines since the mid-90's. She lives by the adage, "Anything can happen on Muni" (and also, "That's not water.")

In Case You Missed Friday’s Penis Puppet Show


Photo by Stuart Dixon

We are still on a high from Friday’s Riders with Drinks, where so many of you came out that the Make-Out Room had to call for backup bartenders! We are speechless about the great energy from our performers and audience. We’ve got more Muni stories in the bag, but before we move on with the week, here is a little recap of the hot, hilarious, and awesome night at Riders with Drinks.

If you were there on Friday, you know that we closed the show with some homemade sock puppet re-enactment of the “Penis in public” story. Pictures of the puppets and other hilarity after the jump.
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Riders with Drinks: Hella Hot, Literally

Thank you to those of you who made it last night to Riders with Drinks, our first event! We are still in disbelief how many people we managed to pack into the Make-Out Room, raising the temperature in there by at least 20 degrees, I think.

We’ve got photos and videos to share, but for now, check out the post by the Tenderblog about last night’s spoken word hilarity. And for a little weekend fun, here’s a selection of goodies from last night’s Muni haiku troupe:

Stop yelling at me
Or just stop yelling near me
Did I just get flashed?
– Tara Ramroop

On crowded buses,
Always protect purses and —
Oh look, Some vomit!
– Ileana Shevlin

I, Muni Humper
Filled with longing and despair
Are you my angel?
– Chris Lindsey

Riders with Drinks Tonight!

md-logo-with-bus

Riders with Drinks, Muni Diaries’ first spoken word party, is tonight! Come hear your fellow riders tell hilarious, cringe-inducing, disgusting, and other worthy stories of our beloved public transit system. We’ve got a haiku troupe, musical performance, and live re-enactments of some of your favorite stories. And did we mention that the Make-Out Room makes a deliciously mean Sidecar?

Muni Diaries Riders with Drinks
Friday, June 12, 7:30 p.m. to 9:30 p.m. (no cover! 21+ )
Make-Out Room — 3225 22nd Street (cross street is Mission)
Routes serving the area: BART 24th St. Station, 12, 14, 22, 26, 33, 48, 49, 67

Just Another Night Riding the 22

Knife

It was a Friday night and I was on my way home from work. I had just gotten off BART at 16th Street and walked over to the bus stop to catch the 22. At first, everything seemed normal. Lots of people were begging for change, people were talking on their cell phones, other were people standing around waiting for the bus and tons of people were walking by in the general area. It seemed like another normal night at 16th and Mission.

As I waited for the 22, I heard some rowdiness over yonder, behind me. I looked over my shoulder and I saw that there were some guys goofing around with each other. They weren’t yelling. Just bumping into each other and being loud.

A few seconds later, these guys walked around to the front of the bus shelter where I was standing. There were three of them. Three Hispanic guys who spoke only Spanish. They were all over the place. One guy was even wandering in the street. I noticed that each of them had a bottle of tequila in their hand.

Suddenly, a black guy came out of nowhere and started speaking broken Spanish to these guys. The black guy walked in the street a bit and around the bus shelter, in plain sight of me, but out of view of the cameras located at the intersection. I’m not sure what triggered it, but one of the Spanish-speaking guys must have pissed off the black guy. This black guy was a young kid with nothing to lose. He seemed to be by himself and started talking mad shit to these guys in Spanish. It almost seemed like he was trying to egg them on into a fight. As soon as the black guy walked right in front of me, he lifted up his sweatshirt to show the fact that he had a gun in his drawers. Everyone standing in the bus shelter bolted out of the area, including myself. The other guys saw the gun, but continued talking back to the black guy. It was like the threat of the black guy having a gun and using it didn’t even phase them. These guys were obviously intoxicated.

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Philosopher’s conversation

conversation on a bus

“You know I am going there because I have to go, not because I want to go. There is a difference between ‘have to’ and ‘want to’.” The woman screamed.
A man approached her and looked like he was kissing her.
Then, he screamed, “There are two type of people in this society; one that has money and one that is drunk. Everyone else is in between. If you are not one of these two, don’t fucking come knock on my door! The light is on, but I won’t answer.”
Approach to the woman again, he makes a Karate-like move. Then, he sits on the chair and screams, “I like Stephen King!”
It is quiet for a moment, then the woman screamed at the man, “At least I know where I am going! But you don’t know where you are going!!”
He screamed back to her, “But I know where I am!”

She repeats, “I know where I am going but you don’t know where you are going!”
He responds, “But I know where I am!” Then they begin to shout back and forth.
”I know where I am going but you don’t know where you are going!”
“But I know where I am!”
“I know where I am going but you don’t know where you are going!”
“But I know where I am!”
The man says, “You know, there are people who have and people who don’t!”
The man continued, “You, you, you what! You want to or you have to what?”
The woman screams back to him, “I tell you here is my answer, ‘I don’t know!’ There are always three answers to everything I want, I have to, and I don’t know!”
She continues, “But I know where I am going and you don’t!”
“But I know where I am!” The man screamed. “Have a seat. There is a seat here” He continued as he pointed to the seat next to him.
But she screams, “No! Someone’s ass was sitting there! I am not going to put my ass on someone’s asshole!
“Bitch! You are a fucking bitch, you know. You know what I call someone like you? A Hooker! You are a hooker!”
She says, “Hey, don’t limit your view. If you named it but you can’t see beyond it!
He yells, “Bitch!”
“Hey, be careful what you call me because you don’t know who is listening to you!”
He repeats, “You are a fucking bitch!”
She now screams, “You are an asshole!”
“How did you know my nick name?” He is suddenly calm.

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