Eugenia Chien has been eavesdropping on the 47, 49, or 1 lines since the mid-90's. She lives by the adage, "Anything can happen on Muni" (and also, "That's not water.")

J-Church Food Fight!


Photo by J. McPherson

Tuchmanna tells a story from this morning’s commute. Alas …

So, today starts out normal enough: Muni delays, fog — your typical San Francisco Friday. Boarding the J this morning, I certainly wasn’t expecting the meat-splosion that was about to occur.

Two 15-16-year-old girls climb on at Church and Market, grab a seat directly across the aisle from me, and break open a container of deli wraps filled with an assortment of meats. 15 minutes later when we’re finally between Van Ness and Civic Center, one of the girls starts dropping pieces of meat in the aisle. We make eye contact, she stares me down, I go back to reading. Out of the corner of my eye I see this girl hold up a big piece of meat, dangle it next to me and drop it right next to my bag. I turn to her and politely ask her to please not drop her meat on the floor. Typical spiel about sharing a public space, yada yada yada. The guy sitting next to me chimes in, calls them rude, she starts telling us to pick it up for her, and her friend just sits there laughing.

We’re delayed a few more minutes and are sitting in the train between Civic Center and Powell now, when the meat offender flicks a piece of roast beef that lands on the guy in front of me. He turns to her, and says, “Excuse Me?” She stares him down and says, “WHAT?” All of a sudden this dude erupts. He jumps up, knocks the container of sandwiches into the air so that pieces of lunch meat and wrap go flying everywhere, and starts going after this girl. Her friend jumps in and a full on brawl ensues on Muni. All your typical yuppie riders are engaged in a mix of laughing, screaming, and pulling everyone apart.

After all the meat-heads run off the train, one guy starts muttering about the degeneration of society into a future of barnyard animals and prehistoric creatures.

Then, once everyone calmed down, we all set to picking up the lunch meat and bonding over the ridiculousness of SF. If this doesn’t say, Good Morning, San Francisco, I sure don’t know what does.

We can’t promise food fights, but tonight’s Muni Diaries Live should be no less entertaining. Hope to see you there!

Weekend Photos: Muni Diaries Live Tonight

Cable Car in the Rain
Photo by Thomas Hawk

I was on the 49 last night with at least half the bus dressed in orange and black, and a guy carrying a horn on his back said, “San Francisco is alive tonight!”

Damn right!

So don’t let the rain keep you away from Muni Diaries Live #4 this evening at the Make-Out Room. We can’t wait to see your faces and hear our storytellers on stage. The Make-Out Room has $1 off of all Maker’s Mark drinks, and $4 side cars when you show your Fast Pass, Clipper, or Muni transfer. And you can win prizes from Anthony’s Cookies, Chronicle Books, The SummitMetronome Dance Collective, and Market Street Railway if the rest of audience votes your Muni story the winner.

What more reason do you need?

In Muni news this week:

queue
Photo by Telmo32

Everybody was soaked
Photo by Anna Conti

Wet afternoon on the 14 Mission
Photo by Juicy Rai


Photo by Andy Chapman

f market
Photo by Art Siegel

Where to find poets, twisted minds, and $4 sidecars


Photo by Amber Wolf

What kind of misfit poet would write this:

She stole my heart,
he told me,
and nine months later,
she stole the rest of my shit.

And what kind of twisted hilarious mind would say this?

“I cannot fully shave my Vietnamese accent from my American tongue. Sometimes my ‘clue’ can sound a bit like your ‘glue,’ and other times, when stressed, my ‘bitch’ sounds like your ‘peach.'”

That’s just a little tid bit from our performers — Bucky Sinister and Andrew Lam, respectively. I can’t wait to hear what they’ve got in store for us tonight on stage.

The Make-Out Room is also offering a bonus for Muni riders today: show your Fast Pass, Clipper card, or Muni transfer, and get a delicious Side Car for only $4. Oh, and all Maker’s Mark drinks are $1 off tonight. Don’t let the rain keep you away from Muni Diaries Live!

Off the Hook! Muni Diaries Fast Pass T-Shirts

If you need one more reason to go to Muni Diaries Live tomorrow at the Make-Out Room, here’s one: the brand spankin’ new Muni Diaries Fast Pass T-shirts, hot off the presses, modeled here by our lovely Tara Ramroop.

With the type A Fast Pass being phased out Monday, what better way to memorialize our beloved montly passes than these shirts? They are designed by New Skool‘s Nate1, who is also an in-house artist at Secession Art and Design in the Mission.

We’ll be selling Muni Diaries T-shirts at Muni Diaries Live tomorrow with a show discount. You can also buy these shirts, sweatshirts, and Fast Pass baby onesies at Secession Art and Design.

Take a closer look at Nate’s handywork:

That’s some serious awesome sauce right there.

I got big butt and I cannot lie…


Photo submitted by Muni rider Joey

All right. We’ve talked about guys who sit on the bus with their business splayed. You know, the two-seat-takin’, man-sittin’ guys. But rider Joey saw a fellow passenger on the 45 last week who took it to the next level: taking up three seats and giving her a special view first thing in the morning on her way to work.

What was this guy thinking?! Actually, we know:

“What do you want from me? I’m a guy. Yeah, a big honkin’ guy, and that’s why I just gotta sit here next to you with my legs spread wide apart because I have this equally big honkin’ mass between my legs. I can see you’re aggravated that my right thigh is on my seat and yours, but what can I do? Get a smaller package? You’ll have to ask god about that one.”

(We miss you, Muni Mind Reader!)

In the mean time, dear Sirs Spread-A-Lot, please remember: Don’t be a space evader:


Photo by PinkTentacles.com

Muni Diaries Live this Friday

Muni Diaries Live! Oct 29, 2010

Hey, what are you doing this Friday? I’ll tell you: You’re coming to Muni Diaries Live at the Make-Out Room. We have an excellent lineup of storytellers and a surprise guest. A hint: he’s a Muni insider. You’ll have to come and find out who he is.

If you bring a story to tell on stage, you might win a prize from one of our awesome sponsors, including Anthony’s Cookies, Chronicle Books, The SummitMetronome Dance Collective, and Market Street Railway.

And you can rock some SF love and shop with our sponsor Secession Art and Design — the lovely Eden will be on hand to sell transit-themed baby onesies and t-shirts.

So pen us in, write us on a Post-It, tap us into your iPhone, enter us into your Google Calendar, do whatever you gotta do to join the fun and share a drink with your fellow riders. We can’t wait!

Recaps of Muni Diaries Live! one, two, and three.

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